Teach Your Kids: Safe People and the Secrets They Keep


Children should be taught to confidently refuse requests and trust their instincts when they sense something is wrong.

Young woman putting helmet on cute boy, with cycle lying at the back in park. Mother puts her son protective helmet for riding bike.

By Victoria Chesang

When it comes to keeping our children safe, it’s crucial to teach them that trustworthy individuals won’t ask them to keep secrets.  In this article, we will explain why this is important and provide tips to help children recognise and manage such situations.

  1. Defining Safe People:

Let’s begin by defining the concept of safe people to our young ones. Safe people are those who sincerely care about their welfare, respect their boundaries, and consistently have their best interests in mind. Examples include parents, teachers, and trusted adults.

  1. Discussing Secrets

: It’s time to sit down with our children and discuss the topic of secrets. We can clarify that not all secrets are negative, such as surprise parties or gifts. However, certain secrets must never be kept. Our aim is to enable everyone to differentiate between a harmless secret and one that induces discomfort or fear.

  To promote transparency, we encourage open communication.

It is crucial to inform our children that they can always speak to us or another trustworthy adult if they are asked to keep a secret that seems inappropriate. Our aim is to provide a secure environment where they can discuss their worries without any fear of judgement or punishment.

Teaching assertiveness can further boost their confidence. Children should be taught to confidently refuse requests and trust their instincts when they sense something is wrong. Role-playing different scenarios can be helpful in practicing assertiveness and reinforcing the importance of their feelings and boundaries.

 Additionally, we should assist children in identifying trusted adults in their lives whom they feel comfortable turning to for assistance. It is imperative to provide our kids with a support system consisting of trusted family members, teachers, or neighbours, whom they can always depend on during any unsafe or uncomfortable situations. Hence, we need to educate them that trustworthy individuals would never coerce them into keeping secrets, or make them feel uncomfortable. By doing so, we can ensure their safety and wellbeing.

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